The woman's role in abuse

I have heard many complaints about how domestic helpers are not as innocent as we think they are - or that they abuse the children they are supposed to take care of, steal etc. etc.

Firstly, no one is so naive to think that ANY group is made up of completely innocent people. But you have to ask the question - if domestic helpers are also doing bad things in Kuwait, why is this happening? How come a few go completely nuts in a house that apparently treats them well?

Recently we came across a case of an Indonesian girl who was sold to a person who then sold her to his friend ... and this guy forced her to 'sleep' with 3-5 guys every day. Isn't it against the law for a maid under one kafeel, to work in more than one house, or to sell her off? But still these ladies go from house to house, working - sometimes because they want to, often because they are forced to. Can you guarantee that the girl who works in your house has not had a terrible experience in her long string of employment here, that has affected her mentally?

Here's an eye opener from religious leaders in Kuwait I have talked to... Ever since this whole so-called financial crisis, there have been more complaints in Kuwait about husbands beating their wives - MANY more. The number of maid abuse incidents has also increased. And in about 80 percent of cases we've seen, it is the mama of the house that beats the maid. Now i'm not drawing any fast conclusions but - maybe we need to think about that for a bit.

It's not always true, but often in societies, the abused becomes the abuser. The majority of sexual deviants and child molesters have at one time been sexually assaulted themselves as children. Violence works in this repetitive way also.

If the abuse of wives is not stopped, the abuse of maids will not stop, and if the abuse of maids is not stopped, the abuse of whoever the maid can abuse will not stop either. In the most horrible way, Kuwait should consider itself fortunate that these girls mostly choose suicide over murder.

So society may end up looking something like this: Domestic helpers commit suicide en mass, or alternatively, begin the abuse of those under their care. That sounds kind of familiar to me.

Now whatever you think of these ladies, no one wants a society like that. But by a community being passive and indifferent - that is what we are determining for ourselves. Kuwait of the next generation will either move closer towards this, or further away.